Posted By Caulimovirus on July 7, 2008
“Last Warning! Before Immediate lease termination”
.: Today I found this important notice pinned to my door:
.: Now, I’m no grammarian, English is not my major, and I normally let the occasional mistake slip by unnoticed. However, this writing is unacceptable. It was left by management, and they clearly expected everyone in the complex to read it. Let’s do them a favor and rewrite it in a more comprehensible brand of English:
Last warning before immediate lease termination!
We and other tenants are experiencing damage to our properties late at night by unsupervised children. If you leave your children at home alone, I advise you keep track of them at all times (you know who you are).
When I find out — and I will — who is responsible for these damages, their parents’ lease will be terminated immediately. This applies to any visiting guests as well. You, as a parent, are responsible for your children and any of their guests on this property. People work too hard to have their property torn up by unsupervised children. This is unacceptable.
.: Though not perfect, it’s inarguably clearer and and more precise, and that’s after spending less than a minute rewriting it.
.: Am I making too big a fuss over something utterly insignificant? Most definitely. Despite its heading, it’s not the most important bit of writing I’ll ever read. That said, I see nothing wrong with demanding people to adhere to basic standards of writing when they in kind demand things of others.