Script Session

Posted By on September 28, 2005

“Sometimes I Like To Think This Conversation Actually Took Place”

.: Whaddya got for us, Dick?

:-: Okay, how about this:

.: I’m listening.

:-: So there’s this elephant, right? And he has big fucking ears.

.: You’re fired.

:-: Hear me out!

.: You’ve got three minutes.

:-: So he’s got these big fucking ears, and all the other elephants hate him.

.: Naturally.

:-: But what the freaky big-eared elephant doesn’t know, is that his gigantic ears give him the ability of flight.

.: …

:-: He only finds this out after he gets piss drunk and wakes up in a tree, though.

.: The elephant becomes intoxicated at some point?

:-: Yeah, because he had the hiccups and his optimistic mouse friend told him to drink some water. Here’s the best part: while he’s drunk, he has a freaky-ass dream about other elephants.

.: What color are these other elephants?

:-: Pink.

.: I see.

:-: And they’re not only pink, but they’re also shape-shifters. I’ve got this one scene all planned out where we see an elephant who’s made up of nothing but elephant heads. That’ll scare the shit out of any three-year-old for years!

.: Right, well, the more I think about it the more your idea sounds like it’ll actually work. You got a title yet?

:-: I do. I call it: “Goofy Ass Elephant With Big Fucking Ears.”

.: …

:-: It’s a working title.

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5 Responses to “Script Session”

  1. Christina says:

    I feel like someone was slightly scarred by a certain Disney movie in his or her childhood.

  2. kaia says:

    Dumbo was Dallas’ favorite.

  3. Oscar Wilde says:

    Q. Why do elephants have big ears?
    A. Because Noddy won’t pay the ransom.

    Dear boy, absolutely adored your terrist, tererist, treserist post.

  4. Angafacwen says:

    I agree with Christina.

  5. jer says:

    I came for the terrorist post, I stayed for this brilliant illustration of the hollywood movie factory. I subscribe to rss via bloglines for the future good stuff.

    Thanks for the entertainment.